I have been writing for a little while now…
Not 1 single (non blog world) person knew about my writing here on wellingtonchic.co.nz for the first 18 months of it’s life zip, nada, nilch!
Then I told Miss 16…that was until now…til today.
You might be wondering…
Why this is the first time you have heard about wellingtonchic.co.nz and that I write on my own site/blog?
- I’m writing for myself
- There are no deterrents
- For practice
- It’s in my inbuilt nature to be under the radar
- Protection for my fragile writing esteem
Writing for myself
You all know very well… that my mind has always come up with loads of idea’s, concepts, thoughts and crazy inventions everyday…
I write these down in Notebooks, Folders, Evernote, iphone Notes, scraps of paper, on backs of receipts…or even on the back of my hand.
After thinking about it and planning it for months and months and months and writing squillions of drafts for months and months and months, I finally got brave and put fingers to keys and launched my own website/Blog here, with just a small smattering of what goes on in my head.
It was really important to me in the beginning to write for MYSELF.
Yes, I knew I was sending it out into the world.
But it was as much about getting it out of my head and onto a page as it was to share it with others that it may teach, guide, “entertain” or help them.
The topics I wrote about have become very broad since I first started and I write about all sorts of palava and anything now that takes my fancy.
Yes wellingtonchic.co.nz was live for other people to read, but in my own tone, my on wonky style of writing, my own flawed way and just to get it out there.
I didn’t want to have ANY deterrents from the word go.
I love my friends and family fiercely, but I knew I would be too ridiculously self conscious.
I am fairly sure you, my friends and family would have been supportive, but I wasn’t prepared to take that chance in the beginning.
I know it would have been too much pressure while I worked out the kinks, worked out how and what I want to write and succeeded and failed in my own time many times first.
Now, get this weirdness – I felt more comfortable that complete strangers would be reading my words, than the people I loved and cared about the most. I know, weird aye!
In a way, it was probably easier to know that strangers didn’t like what I wrote, but would be incredibly hard if the people I loved thought it was stupid, crap, didn’t make sense or they simply just didn’t get it.
Honestly, I was also afraid of failing and crashing and burning at it.
I was afraid of starting this and not persevering and then being over it within 3 months.
…and that has been the case many times, where my crazy-intense life completely takes over having and creative outlet or even any head space to form it.
I was also afraid my complete hodgepodge of blog idea’s and concepts would be a mess while I was finding my feet (it is still a hodgepodge, but I like it like that still).
I needed to spend time, be kind to myself and let myself find my feet.
I always have a mental check list in my head of:
Before I hit publish…would it be ok if these people read it…
My Best Friend…
…but I wasn’t actually letting any of you read it! 😉
It’s a fine line, as I still wanted to be real, but be careful with what I was putting out there into the world. That one or all of those might see it one day.
I was afraid that I would write thinking about them reading it too much and it would change what I put out there especially the times when I have written more openly about stuff that’s hard.
I know on one hand my Blog readership would have grown faster and spread further if friends and family were reading, commenting, sharing and following…but I also didn’t want those to feel like they HAD to read it.
That Aunty Dot didn’t feel like she HAD to write …. “oh that’s lovely dear” …
I don’t have an Aunty Dot, but you get my drift.
I was afraid of it being crap and then that crap failing….
So with all that in mind, I was happy to work away on it in the background, build confidence, get a little better at my writing and get brave about it at the same time.
I know some of you would have been right behind me from the start, cheering me on from the couches, being some of my first excited readers and will forever follow me as…cough…cough…’fans’…
But even now, as I know some of you are finding my writing for the first time, I wish I had even more time to practice!
Come on guys, you all know me well.
It’s in my nature to keep things like this close to my chest, move under the radar and work it out for myself first before I talk about it.
It’s that independent streak in me trying to make it on my own.
I find it really hard to ask for help (or even accept it as you know), so this had to be done all on my own firstly.
Just as much as I needed to feel my way with my writing I also needed to feel my way around the interwebs with writing anonymously.
Whereas if you all new about it, you could/might share it or link my personal Facebook into it, use names etc…
I wanted and needed to be completely anonymous from the start, til I knew what I was comfortable with.
From the start, I haven’t named people on my blog.
Except for generic names or pseudonym eg. Miss 16 (I had to google how to spell that word pseudonym – haha!)
Still up until now, I chose not to post photos that identify people, only backs or obscured pictures or cropped areas.
When I talk about people I generally not directly referring to them, it’s more around them.
This may change a little in future, but I would always check with you first if I can share a personal story or direct picture of you. I’m still feeling my way with this.
Staying anonymous also protected me… from people I know… and what I KNOW would have been a very fragile writing esteem.
Even now thinking about you guys reading this post almost makes me want to switch off my site from anyone being able to read…
OK, so you may now get why I kept it to myself for so long… and now may have loads more questions, so I’ve tried to answer all the things you may wonder below:
How did I keep it to myself for so long?
My writing happens in the smallest snippets of the day, so when I’m waiting for Miss 16 to finish Sports practice or Rehearsal that have gone on longer than planned for example, so alot of my draft writing would happen on my 3.5 inch screen on my iphone.
We are up ridiculously early each morning to get us both through the showers and out the other side… this leaves me with often around 30 mins to kill while she is still getting ready. I also write then.
Initially I then wrote after Miss16 had gone to bed… when she is away at her friends, Dad’s, or has other commitments.
Miss16 never initially picked up on it, until not long before I shared it with her. She actually really-really liked that she was the only one that new about it. Even yesterday when I told her I that more people might figure it out if they read my LinkedIn CV profile properly or are handed my CV (that’s because I mention the Freelance writing I do for Kiwi Families on it).
If you follow me on personal Facebook, you will wonder why you never saw anything about my blog on there.
Easy initially as you all know, I hardly ever post or write any thing at all on there. People think I’m dead and the once a year or so that I do post a pic everyone is always so surprised.
It’s also because I have a separate Facebook Blog PAGE, but it is administered by an also completely separate personal administrator (me) Wellington Chic (as person), so isn’t at all linked to my own actual personal page, so no friends or family would see my posts there.
I have a private Instagram page, but this is linked also to nothing. I have a completely separate Wellington Chic Instagram page.
I have separate emails for Wellington Chic also.
So no active deception, you just didn’t see anything on any of my personal pages and I wasn’t flaunting it around.
My first extended family member followed my Instagram recently, which was really weird…if I’m honest my first instinct was to block them…(as much as I love them dearly)…but I didn’t.
I don’t know if they followed me knowing it was me, as no message came with it, or they have followed me a little accidentally…you know where instagram suggest all your Facebook friends to follow.
Who did I tell first?
I was coming home from my first foray into #brunchclub and knew now was the time.
As I mentioned above, I told my Daughter Miss 16.
So how did it go telling Miss 16?
I had just come home from #brunchclub and decided that was the time.
She thought I had been out on a DATE with a BOY…so was slightly disappointed that it wasn’t a Boy… hehe
She also was kinda excited because that was her second guess, as she saw me once making my little favicon logo.
She had loads of questions about what I write about, who reads it, do I get comments, how many views had I had (not that many!).
Then she wanted to see ALL of it, my Blog, all my Social Media pages like Facebook, Twitter & Instagram.
So now what?
Am I allowed to talk about it… or is it like Fight Club?
You do not talk about the Blog… No, joking, quite the opposite.
I would LOVE your encouragement.
It’s frickin scary if I’m honest knowing people that I know (outside of the blog world) that will be reading my writing sometimes. My thoughts, my fears, my insecurities… but I know I am meant to put it out there.
It’s still changing and morphing all the time and I’m not 100% what shape it’s going to end up in.
It’s a lot – alot harder to grow your blog with your friends and family don’t know about it.
As you don’t have naturally supportive friends family forwarding, sharing, following and commenting. So a lot of the initial grunt work was 100% on me, but it’s ticking along nicely in it’s own little small way.
What if I don’t like what you write about?
Be prepared to not like my writing.
You may hate it.
You may think it’s boring.
You may think it’s too casual.
You may think it’s not good England 😉
You may think I use a ridiculous amount of these… and these !!!…and these 😉
You may think she writes just like she talks.
You may not relate.
That’s all totally-totally fine!……..!!!!!…….!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’m even kind of expecting it.
So how can I support you if I do like it…or some of it…?
* Read it…lots
* Share it, like it & heart ♥ my posts on your Facebook, Twitter, Instagram…
* Follow my Facebook on my blog page and Friend my Wellington Chic personal page
* Follow me Twitter
* Follow me Instagram
* Subscribe to my You Tube Channel… I only have 1 measly video up so far, but I have some fun idea’s for this coming up one day
* Take some of my Business Cards and hand them out to strangers… eek!
* Tell your friends to enter my Giveaways or Competitions
* Print out posts you like and plaster them around the town on lamp posts and car windscreens (joke) (maybe) (yeah joke)
* Link to it from your website
* Comment on the blog telling me your thoughts on a post (gives me warm fuzzies to read comments)
* Share things with me about Blogging, Writing, Opportunities or anything
* Subscribe here and you get sent a link everytime I post something new up
* Save the link in your Bookmarks bar or or your phone screen
* Tell me you have been reading
* Tell me other things you might like me to write about
* Buy things from my Amazon shop
* Click/Buy things from my Affiliate links, don’t click if you are not interested, but if you are, please do as that earns me tiny bits of commision
* Support me as I branch it out slowly in wider directions, I have some very quiet plans for wellingtonchic.co.nz including quite possibly a name change
* Excuse me while I grab my phone in mid conversation and say “I have to write this thought down before I forget it”
* Be gentle… this is scary for me
Can I be a silent Fan?
Yes, yes you can be a silent family/friend stalker reading all of my pages and post and never letting onto me that you are…
Until you slip into conversation accidentally about the state of my holey pillow case that I KNOW I never shared in person with anyone and only wrote about it on my blog! HA! 😉
But I don’t mind.
It’s been 3 years and 1 month since I started writing back in September 2013.
I still have a whole lot to learn, I am still practicing getting better, I am still making loads of mistakes…
But I like it.
I like writing, I like Blogging, I like having my own little space in the world where I can totally do, write or say whatever I want and that people might like or relate to.
Watch this space as to where it goes from here.
…It also may go nowhere and I may never post anything ever again…
Or have another nearly 5 month hiatus like I have over the last 5 months when my life was recently way too full on to finish any writing.
Hey, forgot to say, I also write a little bit over here for these guys, freelancing on Bi-monthly articles on Parenting and Teenagers on kiwifamilies.co.nz
Reading my Kiwi Families posts are maybe a good place to start… as writing for them pushes me the most to really write the best I can, here’s what I’ve written for them lately:
• 5 parental lessons I MUST pass on to my daughter
• Party ideas for 15 to 16 year old girls
• Negotiating teen birthday parties
• Tips for starting the high school year
• Is your teen’s world really that different to yours?
• Transitioning from tween to teen responsibilities
• 8 ways to help kids find their passions
• Single parents navigating special calendar dates
• Welcoming teenagers into your home
• ‘What is this ‘Geocaching’ the kids keep talking about?’
• Milkshakes at midnight: Celebrating the big, small and weird things
• 13 things to equip your teen with before they go out
• Questions to ask before you say YES to your teenager
• Entering running events with your children
• 5 creative ideals for single parents
• 10 Fun Single Parent family traditions